It’s not about the sword
It’s not about how deep the cut is
It’s not about the arrow
It’s not about the precision of an archer
It’s not about the cavalry
It’s not about the intimidating steps of the horses
It’s not about the iron fist
It’s not about the force of a deathly blow
It’s not about the war
It’s not about hatred, agony, anger, or power
It’s about being the reason to fight
It’s about hearing “I won’t ever let you go”
One year down, forever to go
Side by side, year by year
To be continued 
Tidak bisa berlindung dibalik dusta
Bahwa beberapa serpihan begitu terekam
Dan begitu mudah melintas kembali
Bilangan, abjad, masa, dan rasa
Berharap setidaknya menjadi alasan
Untuk melepas yg terpendam
Namun dunia itu sudah diakhiri
Tanpa menyisakan kesempatan
Untuk menoleh ke belakang
Untuk meragu
Sesalpun tidak menghampiri
Hanya rajukan kecil yang bertanya
Mengapa hari itu
tidak lagi terkenang
When I was in junior high, I wrote “neuroscientist” as my dream job in my year book.
Why?
I happened to be a fan of Utada Hikaru back then. She’s a japanese singer, songwriter, and producer. I have collections of her albums (original cassettes and cds! I love her too much to buy the pirated ones) and like a typical fan, I followed her updates by subscribing to a monthly japanese lifestyle, anime and manga magazine. In one of the issues, there was an article that stated about her went to New York to take neuroscience as her major in university.
I thought how cool is that?? An artist, took a super serious science as her major? I’m not saying that an artist isn’t scientific, but the stereotype shows the fact that a lot of them aren’t taking education seriously. Getting into college is an achievement, and choosing that kind of major suggested her intelligence, in my opinion (why on earth you want to spend 4 years of your youth to study about brain, nerves, and their related problems if you’re not intellectually challenged?)
Hence, I was overwhelmed by the news and had this ambition to become a neuroscientist also. It wasn’t that far from my intial aim, to become a doctor (most of the kids want to be a doctor and I wasn’t really aware about neurosurgeon or neurologist existence at that time), plus i’m kinda a bookworm/geek when i was in junior high school, so the scientist title suited me. Therefore, I decided to write that in my year book.
However, 10 years later, I find myself not being a neuroscientist. I’m now a dentist, and on my way to become a surgeon, which is not my childhood dream (a doctor in my childhood imagination was the one who gave medication, not the one who cut and stitch).
But neuroscience always and never fails to fascinate me.
It started from a fanatic act to a true admiration. I’m kinda glad that I have to study this over and over again, in pre clinical, clinical period, and now in residency. It needs a lot of efforts to understand but it’s more interesting than a best selling novel 
(once again, in my opinion)
So, do I still want to be a neuroscientist?
Well… I still want to be a neuroscientist, an (surgical) oncologist, a medical geneticist, or even an immunologist. I hope that my brain have the capability to learn about these stuff, considering the fact I’m not a genius like Ibnu Sina, da vinci, Galileo or other multi-expertise scientist.
Meanwhile, become a wife seems to be a great option, don’t you think 
